Monthly Archives: June 2006

Doozies

Here are 2 of my favorite match.com intro emails…

Donna,
Adventurous and excitng guy here to solve your dilemma. Can you handle this dangerous and naughty guy. I am ready for you now.
Bill
####@yahoo.com
XXX-XXX-XXX (the big easy)

Ciao Bella,
My name is Joe. I am 38 years young and I’m looking for that special person that I can keep SAFE in my arms and who likes to take day trips, go into New York City to walk around and make a few stops at the vending carts. I just can’t get enough of the city. For laughs I go to Champps on Wednesday nights to see people up on stage just making a complete fool of them selves trying to sing. YOU MUST LOVE MUSIC !!!
So, if you are looking for a friend send me an email to #####@verizon.net
Ciao,
Giuseppe

No, I do not have dates with either fellow.

Bad Moon Rising

I have a date tonight. Yeah, another match.com fellow. I’m doing my work and I notice my Magic Eight Ball sitting by me and so I pick it up.
“Magic Eight Ball, will this be a good date tonight?”
“My reply is no”
OH NO! So I shake it again and the answer is: Reply Hazy, Try Again. I do as the Magic Eight Ball instructs and the answer is: Very Doubtful!!!!!

This is not a good sign. Not at all!

Gay Superman

I’ve been hearing bits and pieces about the supposed gayness of the new Superman movie and its star, Brandon Reeves. It got me to thinking about a video I LOVED back in 1985 that used to be shown all the time on MTV. I checked out youtube and the vido is posted! So how does this video relate to Superman being gay? I remember watching the video as a little girl and my father walked by and said, “Holy crap those guys are fruitloops!”

Harrowing and pulverizing

I am so tired.  This evening I had a date that just didn’t go well.  I think the blame can be equally distributed.  He really shouldn’t have called me an hour before it was time to meet to tell me he couldn’t make it.  I should have been nice and gracious but instead I told him he wasted my time and he should go to hell.  Perhaps it was guilt but he called me back and said he had changed his mind and would meet me.  I should have stuck to my guns and stayed far away.  Instead of doing that, I met him.  I really thought I would be able to drop the ill will I felt but I couldn’t and I spent the evening feeling very uncomfortable and wanting to go home and watch La Femme Nikita episodes.

Musika!

I am addicted to Katie Melua. I can’t stop listening to her! I think she has a similarity to Margo Guryan and Carla Bruni, both of whom I have found myself stuck on for weeks at a time. When I was watching Lake House with Sandy Bullock, I was surprised to hear Carla Bruni crooning during one scene! Carla may be one of the luckiest women alive. Not only was she born rich and beautiful but she also has musical talent to boot. We all have skills. My sister is great with directions and can finish any Sudoku in a minute. Me? I make a mean bowl of jello.

Eat your heart out, Carla Bruni!

Travelin’ WoMAN

I left my house this morning at 6:30 am.  I arrived home at 7:30 pm.  I AM POOPED!  I boarded at the rear of the train at the very last second.  It was crowded.  The train took off and I slowly started inching my way forward.  It was slow going.  By the time I finally got to the front of the train where there were open seats, the train stopped at Newark.  In a way, you could say I walked from New York to Newark!

Falling

I slept so deeply last night. It was difficult forcing myself to get up when my alarm went off. The night was sprinkled with strange dreams. I lived in a huge wooden house in the middle of a field. People were arriving for a party I was throwing. The first guest was my old Karate instructor. I haven’t seen him or his wife in years and years. I ran to him and he picked me up and twirled me around. I was surprised he had no trouble lifting me and I felt light and free. As he spun me, I couldn’t help but look down and as I did, I noticed he wasn’t standing in the same spot but he was moving towards a steep, grassy decline. My heart started to race and I feared he would lose his footing and I would go hurtling down the hill. Right before his foot should have started down the drop he stopped the spinning and everything was fine. I was relieved. More guests arrived and crowded at the top of the decline. Instead of staying safely at the top, people seemed compelled to throw themselves down the hill. One guest log-rolled to the bottom. Another guest somersaulted while another slid on her back. I awoke.

This is what is out there…

You can read my match.com profile on my ABOUT page.

Today I got the following email from a potential “match:”

From: cannes69
To: DonnaVille
Date received: June 26, 2006
Subject: Harrowing HTML

Harrowing and Pulverizing? — how about –the last time I tried this 2 yrs ago – I almost threw up in my mouth. Sorry – a little to explicit – but judging by your prose – you get it. Anyhow – check out my profile – I think our wit is a nice match — at the very least – and if you are looking for a similar partner in crime – give me a shout – Joe

HE THREW UP IN HIS MOUTH! These men really know how to woo the ladies!

I keep the ends out for the tie that binds

Back to work again! The weekend is over and it’s time to be productive. Last night Lisa and I watched that Johnny Cash movie. I had heard it was good and I was really looking forward to seeing it. Now don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t horrible, but it also wasn’t good. I kept hearing how it was such a wonderful love story. I am sorry but there is no such thing as a romantic love story when the lead character is a psychologically tortured-drug addict. The woman who played his first wife was portrayed as a horrific shrew. I found it very disturbing mainly because I would be a horrific shrew too if my husband took drugs, slept with groupies and carried on with his duet partner. She wasn’t the only one smeared. Apparently Elvis is the one that got Johnny Cash hooked on drugs! The fellow they had playing Elvis was so un-Elvis like! Tall, lanky and completely without sex appeal. And now we get to the singing. Leaf Phoenix sounded like a drunk hobo. Reese Witherspoon actually sounded too good to be June Carter. Years ago I downloaded a ton of Johnny Cash songs from Audiogalaxy. Some of my favorites were these weird love songs he sang with Bob Dylan. It was only recently that I found out that it wasn’t Bob Dylan dueting with Johnny Cash, it was June Carter! I think I will stick to watching The Coal Miner’s Daughter.
Next movie up on the NetFlix queue is Getaway with Steve McQueen.